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wishlist:
* Samantha Thavasa bag & simple bag ♥
* get a degree
* lose another 7kg
* open another bank account to save money!
* earn/ save more money
* new laptop/ netbook
* explore the NEW me

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Layout: vehemency
Icon: reruntherace

Primary School
★Jieshi
★Shaun
★Evon
♚Yingyan

Secondary School
♚Corrine
★Hidhir
★Weijie
★Wendy

Outside friends
★Aileen
★Diyanah
★Fidah
★Hidayah
★Joycelyn
★Ilah
★Khir
★Shaq

Republic Poly
♚Bing Long
★Edna
♚Priscilla
♚Simin
★Yan ting
★Derek
★Atiqah

Blogs i visit
Dweam
Fidelis
♚Priscilla's blogshop
Xiaxue
Zoe Raymond
Monday, February 27, 2012, 10:28 PM

i should be studying, i should be doing my proj. but seeing that, i totally had no mood for anything.
the feeling just sucks. the first time im feeling this shitty after the break up.

it's hard to be the nice girl. endure and endure. the feeling sucks.




Sunday, February 19, 2012, 9:19 PM

i didn't know i have the face of a player. this is the best joke i've ever heard so far. ha.




Friday, February 17, 2012, 9:05 AM

bridging lessons started like two weeks ago..

they know i'm quitting in apr =/ but i really need to make a decision between school and work. in the end, no matter what i faced, i stick to STUDIES. cause i want to do that and finish it ASAP.

V day~

nothing much? had a pre-V day celebration with someone though. haha. simple date with a dinner after sch ~ SAKURA! haha. missed it! but the taste of the foods like dropped =(

on the actual day, i spent it with my bitches! haha. it was crazy. been long since i last met them! missed them so much!

D, what's wrong with you? yes, i was greatly affected by the idiotic msg sent by you on V DAY. yes, thanks for spoiling the end of such a wonderful day. u wished me, u apologise. what do you expect me to do? forgiveeeeee youuu~ no way will i forgive you for betraying me when i dont bother looking out for other guys even when we're quarreling all the time. i stayed true to you because i believe we could overcome everything, and i believed you will stay true to me as well.

but you did me wrong, you scolded me on your bdae and on NY's eve. u scolded like you did nothing wrong and im fully responsible for you betraying me. yes, im bad tempered, thats why you chose to leave/ betray me. my life was miserable. like i lost my soul and everything. but now, i'm somehow finding my life back after 1 month plus, you came back into my life again even up till now. what's wrong with u?

you expect me to forgive you and treat you like a friend? i'm sorry to say, i can't do it. cause i trusted you so much. even when you asked me to wait for you to make up your mind after your attachment in march, i believed you, i waited for you. i even counted the number of days left to having you by my side once again. but~ just one week after u asked me to wait, u got together with her alrdy. i trusted you so much... even till the last day...

u thought i would be waiting for you? sorry, i'm not. yes, you created a huge phobia in me. i can't seem to trust guys now. but there're some whom i chose to trust still, up till now. because thanks to you, they came to my life. seriously a big 'thank you'. without you leaving, i seriously wouldn't know how it feels to be pampered and everything.

i'm still affected by your msg, but that doesn't mean i'm waiting for you. of course i will feel sad and etc, no matter what it's a 2.5 yrs of relationship, a guy who was beside me all the time, doing things together, going places together. u can move on fast, but not me. if you need my forgiveness then you will be able to move on and stop contacting me, let me tell you this, i can never forgive you so fast. i want to make you guilty for as long as possible=)

oh, i can see that you dont really love that girl. just have this feeling =)

sch is making me stressed up. sigh. and should i give him a chance? i really dont know =( cause i'm afraid.~




Sunday, January 29, 2012, 6:42 PM

~period, headache, cough~ best combi for getting me ready for tomorrow's work -.-

got back to baking again! so happy! =) i wish i had an oven at home so i could bake anything and everything. just want to try out different things and all. not that happy with the results though. but now i roughly know what went wrong =) improvements needed! =D

i really wonder who i am to you. it seems as thou u treat all the girls the same. but, why did you say all those things? it seems like no one knows what you're thinking except for yourself. i really am confused by your actions. can you please tell me what you're thinking? and why did you say those things? =(

but i guess i will just wait~

"the smile on your face makes me blush"




Saturday, January 28, 2012, 2:20 PM



i'm seriously not used to guys taking care of me, guess it's because i'm always the one taking care of them, which includes D. i just feel weird. hmmm. but thank you for the med! =) hope i will recover soon before work starts. haha.

D, please stop asking how i am now. cause i'm doing great. thanks for your concern. yes, i was miserable for the whole week or so, even on 30th dec. but you were the one who ditched me, cheated on me, left me believing there's a chance we will get back together. i even begged you for 3 days, crying every single moment. but you lied once again. you made me really miserable, but, thanks to you, wonderful people came to my life. they made me feel pampered. they took care of me, were there for me when i needed someone. i'm really having the greatest time of my life now. a life that you will never be able to give me. so stop asking me how i am. cause my answer will always be the same. i'm doing very great right now, enjoying my life to the fullest. please refer to my fb if you don't believe me =) but thanks for entering my life 2 and a half years back. cause you made me see things from a different point of view.

"i fell for your smile. i like it how you smile happily. =)"




Sunday, January 08, 2012, 9:15 PM

我喜欢上一个我不该喜欢的人。

i'm so confused right now. i really don't know what i'm doing.

now, when i think back on the things i've done for him, i felt so silly&stupid. i believe not all girls can do it. i'm just too soft hearted. i hope he won't turn back. all i know is i won't want him back. but i'm soft hearted. hmmm.

but i kinda like the life i'm leading right now? like i can go out with anyone, anytime and anywhere i want to. yet, there's something missing. i don't know how to describe the emptiness. but i know it's there in me no matter what i do. maybe i'm still not used to it ba. for 2.5 years, there's someone by my side no matter where i am, what i do, what time and etc. now it's all gone.

i guess i'm quite irritating. say won't emo and all, end up getting emo randomly. i guess i will stop irritating you with my nonsense and all. cause i don't want you to dislike me or find me irritating. =( i really don't want you to feel that way. =( but yet, i just want to contact you."Sometimes, I don't text you first because I don't want to feel like I'm annoying you."

on a lighter note. i shopped ytd! yes, $300+ gone! felt great! go into first shop --> look--> try--> buy = $103. it felt great. and thanks to the break up, i lost weight and i got to fit into those dresses i thought i wasn't able to wear at all! =D am a happy girl!




Monday, January 02, 2012, 2:42 AM

finally! my last post was so last year. oh well.

the last month of 2011 was a disaster yet very happening. i got dumped in the beginning of the month. and very fast, he got together with another girl. but, i'm thankful, i got to know more friends because of this issue. that's why my life is so happening. going out, shopping, doing things randomly, no need to report anything/everything to a particular person. it felt quite good though the emptiness is there. oh oh! i realised i got richer as well, not bad right? haha

i've been thinking, i realised that i've changed somehow or rather. i used to know how to react fast and shoot people (most of the times), and i always love to quarrel and argue back. but after that incident, i realised i got quieter. maybe it's because that's one of the reasons why he left and it changed me. i wasn't able to react and shoot back (in a joking way) now to anyone. i believe those who're close to me and have tasted how i shoot them will see the difference in me.

somehow or rather, i like this quieter me, yet at the same time, i feel weird. cause the friends i make now are different. maybe it's my fault, i don't know when to be serious and when not to. that's why i'm always at the extreme ends and never in the middle (something i hope to achieve).

i do know that my life is boring, i don't play games, i don't know anything new. but that's because i wasn't exposed to all these things last time. my fault? sigh, everything seems to be my fault. no matter what i do, it'll always be my fault.

at least i lost 4kg since that incident! and i want to lose more to hit my target and gain the confidence which i didn't have since a teenager. i will work hard towards it.! plus, i will explore the new me and see what changes i can do =)

first post for the year seems like a reflection journal before sleep, yet being an emo post for the year. great job, ly. nights!




Sunday, July 31, 2011, 10:26 PM

i really need to save up for taiwan trip! =( 2K for air tickets, 2K+ for expenses. sigh. where to find money leh? sigh.

i will start my new savings plan when i get my july pay this coming week! shall see if it works. sigh




Sunday, July 03, 2011, 4:03 PM

FUCK FUCK FUCK! GO TO HELL!!!!

going out with 4 girls ALONE seems fine with u huh? u don't even bother asking who's going and you said it's fine with jus four girls and u! WTF ARE U THINKING!? since u want it this way. dun ever blame me for doing what u did to me! FUCKER! our relationship is always not stable, blame those people and yourself! there are things u can avoid, but u chose not to. u seriously dun deserve me! NOT AT ALL!

i'll have my sweet revenge on you before you know it. fuck off!




Monday, May 02, 2011, 12:40 PM

woah! i'm single!


maybe you aren't the one for me. don't expect me to apologise when i've done nothing wrong that caused this break up. you made it all happened. fuck this!